Every year, the hard working folks over at Companies House have to go through the names of all the businesses trying to get registered, and if they believe a ‘reasonable person’ would take offence, it’s not happening.
If you’ve ever spotted a sign and wondered how on Earth someone managed to get a name like that approved, just remember there’s a list hundreds long of all the ones that didn’t make it.
To sate your curiosity, British company forming agent 1st Formations decided to lodge a freedom of information request and they got 12 months worth of business that Companies House told to go back to the drawing board with their names.
They got a list 761 names strong that contained such incredible names as ‘Crappy Nappy’, the ‘Bell End Motor Co’ and the ‘Go F**k Yourself Club’, and Manchester United fans might like to know that last year someone tried to set up ‘Love United Hate Glazer Ltd’.
Perhaps you’d have enjoyed eating at the ‘B**tards Bistro’ or buying whatever it was ‘The Kush Puppie’ was planning on selling you, but alas such things shall never come to pass.
You just know that someone’s optimistic dream died when they weren’t allowed to call their business ‘F**king Great Portraits Ltd’, and you’ve got to feel for whomever tried to get ‘Grumpy Old Git Gardening Ltd’ off the ground.
Even some business names which get the thumbs up run into problems. (ITV News)
If you were the person who asked Companies House to greenlight a business called ‘I Could Tell That My Parents Hated Me. My Bath Toys Were A Toaster And A Radio Ltd’, then really you’ve only got yourself to blame.
Besides, try fitting that on a business card.
Meanwhile, some of them like ‘Immigration and Visa Services UK Ltd’ seem like they were set up in anticipation of some sort of scam, while you’ve got to wonder what someone advertising their services as ‘The Mind Unf**ker’ was doing.
The most common reasons for businesses being told to go and think of another name were profanity (188 rejections) and drug references (121 rejections).
Sexual content led to 113 businesses being told they couldn’t call themselves things like ‘Doggy Style Ltd’ or ‘The Slutty Pizza Co’, while references to violence scuppered 77 names.
There were a further 205 names shut down for unspecified reasons, and there were some names which would make one glad that someone has the ability to reject these suggestions.
It’s certainly not all fun and games with silly names, there are several entries on the list which we’d rather not repeat, and will simply note that some of the entries were rejected for containing hate speech, most often in the forms of racism, sexism and homophobia.
Companies House, where terrible business names go to die. (Gov.uk)
Many of the rejected names heavily referenced drugs, and since the UK is one of the world’s major growers of medicinal cannabis it’s likely that Companies House will have to deal with more drug-related names like ‘Shroom Room’, ‘Colin Bakes Dope (Responsibly) and ‘Medical Cannabis Clinic UK’.
1st Formation director Nicholas Campion said: “Rejecting company names like ‘The Men’s Grooming Clinic’ or ‘Crappy Nappy’ suggests an outdated assessment process.
“What if a legitimate company wants to match their business activities and trading names, as allowed by the likes of the Advertising Standards Agency?
“Companies House is rightly recognised as the world’s preeminent company registrar, but regarding its rejection of certain company names, it may need to bring itself up to date with modern language usage, as the Oxford English Dictionary has done, and, while we’re at it, accommodate the Great British sense of humour.
“We do love a good pun!”
If you want to dig through 12 months of rejected business names, the full list can be viewed here.
Featured Image Credit: Getty Stock Images
